Enkindling

Dear Mom,

Eleven years have passed since you’ve been gone. And I am still missing you. A lot has changed since you left. The man I am becoming is the man you hoped I would be. No doubt there is a plethora of room for improvement in my life. But I have learned plenty; most of it the hard way. And I am blessed because the One who saved you has never let me have more than I could handle.

You will be pleased to know the people who meant the most to me when you were busy making your mistakes have never left me. The relationships that count still count. Though I do not deserve it; the mercy and grace of God surrounds me. Success has found me and I am not referring to the worldly things you left behind.

I cherish home more now because my world has expanded. I have traveled to many countries. I met a lady who reminded me of you in India. Her ill-fated choices and circumstances revealed in her expression still haunt me. But, as He saved you, I know He can save her. I wish you met Jesus long before you died so we could have shared that.

I am sorry I found it hard to love you before you died. So many times before I tried and you let me down. That experience left me with two years of excruciating remorse. Since then I have learned the true meaning of forgiveness. I will never make that mistake again. The one and only Son of God really did pay it all.

I now know in my heart you always loved me though you lacked the ability to give it away. Only Jesus executed that one perfectly. It is ironic that I never found a greeting card to tell you how I truly felt when you were alive. How I wish I had the opportunity again. What an easy endeavor it would be! If I could only say, Happy Mother’s Day.

Love,

Your Son